:: Monday, September 27, 2004 ::
'Let's Make A Deal' Gone Wrong
So I walk in the men's room looking to have a quick squat on a porcelain throne. Now, every corner restroom in the dorm has three stalls apiece for leaving number two (or hurling it back up before it gets that far). Being weird, I decide to go for Door Number Two.
Behind Door Number Two: an unflushed privy. Ewww.
I do believe I'll trade on this one, Monty. In fact, I'll go for Door Number One.
Behind Door Number One: a clean commode.
At first inspection, this bodes well, until I notice that there's no toilet paper in the stall. This is eerily similar to a sorority girl - attractive at first, but disappointing on the follow-through. Thanking God I'm not really on the game show, I take my third option (but not last - there's another three stalls in the men's room down the hall) and go for Door Number Three.
Behind Door Number Three: a clean throne, with a small but managable supply of 'the important papers.'
Having found a suitable stall, I proceeded to do my business and think up this horrid extended analogy.
:: The Squire 1:59 AM :: email this post :: ::